Tuesday, January 02, 2007
I love New Year! I love church and chippies and ceilidhs and kilts and random parties where I know almost no one and random parties where I know everyone and banter and funky music and dancing and staying up with people you love till the sun rises. But most of all I love it because it's new!
l love the fact that a new year is new because it is the best excuse for a fresh start. I'm always in need of fresh starts and frankly I could embark on them anytime, but there's something so official and formal about New Year that makes it easier.
The first definition of the word "new" that comes up in the Oxford dictionary is "not existing before". I always look at a new year like looking at a whiteboard... I like to pretend that it's wiped clean so I can cover with new scribblings that didn't exist before, but really, in truth, it's not. I can choose at this point (at any point really) to have some stuff wiped clean off it, whilst others stay, sometimes by choice, sometimes not. I love the future but the whiteboard isn't completely white because I will not, I cannot forget the past... the past that hurts, heals, strengthens, weakens, teaches, marks, scars... so full of memories... one of the reasons I love blogging is because I love memories and I love reminiscing. And it is for this same reason that I love new year... it gives me a chance to look back and think over and be thankful for all the things that have happened, "good" and "bad", and how I lived and review how I should be living this next year...
Or at least that's the way it should be... that kinda back-fired a little on me this year. Over the last wee while I went through a period of feeling bogged down by guilt and frustrated with myself for not taking opportunities I could have taken, for not putting 110% in when I should have. L'esprit d'escalier once again. But I realised that there is no need for that... God has set me free from sin and guilt and shame... rather than looking back and being frustrated about the times when I didn't give enough, I should be looking and moving forward and learning from past mistakes rather than dwelling on them.
I'm back in France now; Back with sun-lit alps, amazing supermarkets, le français, and keyboards with accents, and am feeling hopeful and expectant! I'm setting out into 2007 with eyes open, ready to live whatever comes along. You see I don't want to settle for mediocre Christianity... (Is it possible to be a "middle of the road, mediocre" Christian?) I want to live life to the full, I want to live life full of God!
I leave with some photographic highlights of my séjour en Ecosse
floating candles at dinner on Christmas Eve
silliness with the sister
ah joys of Scotland; friends, family, boy in kilt... I will miss you...
Scottish rain... I will miss you not
Bonne rentrée à tous
Posted by Dish at 12:19 pm